[he holds up a hand at this juncture, because... he just does not need to know how easy buffy made anything, ever.] Detail. No more with the detail.

[he pinches the bridge of his nose, wishing he had some glasses to clean.] A pirate. You're dating a pirate. Like an actual, 'avast ye landlubbers', 'me hearties', salty sea dog, scurvified pirate?